Beware of “You’re Wrong”


Think about the last time you were told you were wrong. How did you react?

If you’re like me, you probably bristled and immediately wanted to backlash with a biting comment that would put your opponent in place. I hope you didn’t, but I think we all at least know the feeling of wanting to defend our position adamantly, if only to be right.

However, so much more can come from showing respect to other people’s opinions versus saying they are wrong. In “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie, he shares a story about how he had an interior decorator make him some draperies. They were expensive and he didn’t love them.

After telling the story to a friend, she exclaimed that Carnegie had been ripped off. His response: “True? Yes, she had told the truth, but few people like to listen to truths that reflect on their judgment. So, being human, I tried to defend myself. I pointed out that the best is eventually the cheapest, that one can’t expect to get quality and artistic taste at bargain-basement prices, and so on and on.”

But the next day, another friend came over and expressed how she wished she could have Carnegie’s new draperies. His reaction was completely different: “’Well, to tell the truth,’ I said, ‘I can’t afford them myself. I paid too much. I’m sorry I ordered them.’”

The above story is telling and applicable in your business, Affiliate.

How do you solve disagreements with your staff and members? Do you tell them they’re wrong and they need to get a new opinion? Or do you come humbly?

Carnegie also mentions a key to influencing people is if you’re wrong, admit it. Don’t hold it in because of pride. Let it out that you made a mistake. If you do this, your Coaches and members might be more willing to come to the resolve they made a mistake. Don’t start pointing fingers; nothing is going to end well.

Do you have a Coach who thinks the best way to propel the business forward is through introducing a new program, but you don’t think so? Do you have a member who feels wronged by the childcare prices, but you think they are fair? Don’t stir the pot. Use a little diplomacy today, Affiliate, and see where it takes you.

Heather is the editor for Box Pro Magazine. Contact her at